I Wrote Myself A Love Letter

I have my self-esteem valleys. I have mountain tops, too. Oddly they seem proportionate to strange and unrelated things, be it weather, laundry, food, or entertainment options available to me.

One of my favorite friends is big into positive thinking. Normally I am a skeptic but she was so sincere and kind that she won me over in the 2 years we worked together. So now I trust her to recommend those “how to be more awesome” books and gurus.

Yesterday I read about writing a love letter to yourself.

It sounded stupid.

But I did it.

It felt a little like an assignment from Dr. Leo Marvin in What About Bob?.

I addressed my insecurities in the letter as if i was head over heels in love with myself.

I emailed it to myself, and even though I know its from me, it makes me smile. I read it a couple times last night, one of those “I can’t sleep” nights.

If you struggle with your self worth or self esteem or if you feel like everyone treats you like crap, try it.

Here is mine.

Dear Candice,

I am so lucky to have you in my life. Every thought of you fills me with joy and pride. The moment we are together i feel a smile inside of me that bursts out of my heart and onto my face. I love you and think of you constantly. I love your adorable mannerisms, your sexy body, your quirky and endearing world view. I love the way you cook, the way you sing, the way you remember things, and the compelling way you retell them. You make me feel like the most important person in the world. You brought direction to my life and move me toward my goals. With you I can do and be anything that I want. You are amazing. I love you, I love you, I love you. Thank you for letting me share in your beautiful life. You encourage and complete me. Thank you.

In love,

Candice

I shared my letter with a few people. One sweet lady said, “That makes me want to love you, too!”

The good news is, there is plenty of me to go around.

I got the following email from a mentor in awesomeness. He said to share it.

Read it, then go totally ninja on your week. BOOM.

Hey Cancan,

I’m sitting on an airplane thinking about what the best performers and most successful people do to continually outperform everyone around them.

As we enter what I hope will be the single best year of your life yet, I’ve come up with 35 Tips that I invite you to concentrate on. Share these tips, reflect on then, post them where you can see them - and allow them to infuse your mindset:

  1. Remember that the quality of your life is determined by the quality of your thoughts.
  2. Keep the promises you make to others - and to yourself.
  3. The project that most scares you is the project you need to do first.
  4. Small daily improvements are the key to staggering long-term results.
  5. Stop being busy being busy. This New Year, clean out the distractions from your work+life and devote to a monomaniacal focus on the few things that matter.
  6. Read “The War of Art”.
  7. Watch “The Fighter”.
  8. In a world where technology is causing some of us to forget how to act human, become the politest person you know.
  9. Remember that all great ideas were first ridiculed.
  10. Remember that critics are dreamers gone scared.
  11. Be “Apple-Like” in your obsession with getting the details right.
  12. Take 60 minutes every weekend to craft a blueprint for the coming seven days. As Saul Bellow once said: “A plan relieves you of the torment of choice.”
  13. Release your need to be liked this New Year. You can’t be a visionary if you long to be liked.
  14. Disrupt or be disrupted.
  15. Hire a personal trainer to get you into the best shape of your life. Superstars focus on the value they receive versus the cost of the service.
  16. Give your teammates, customers and family one of the greatest gifts of all: the gift of your attention (and presence).
  17. Every morning ask yourself: “How may I best serve the most people?”
  18. Every night ask yourself: “What 5 good things happened to me this day?”
  19. Don’t waste your most valuable hours (the morning) doing low value work.
  20. Leave every project you touch at work better than you found it.
  21. Your job is not just to work. Your job is to leave a trail of leaders behind you.
  22. A job is not “just a job”. Every job is a gorgeous vehicle to express your gifts and talents - and to model exceptionalism for all around you.
  23. Fears unfaced become your limits.
  24. Get up at 5 am and take 60 minutes to prepare your mind, body, emotions and spirit to be remarkable during the hours that follow. Being a superstar is not the domain of the gifted but the prepared.
  25. Write love letters to your family.
  26. Smile at strangers.
  27. Drink more water.
  28. Keep a journal. Your life’s story is worth recording.
  29. Do more than you’re paid to do and do work that leaves your teammates breathless.
  30. Leave your ego at the door every morning.
  31. Set 5 daily goals every morning. These small wins will lead to nearly 2000 little victories by the end of the year.
  32. Say “please” and “thank you”.
  33. Remember the secret to happiness is doing work that matters and being an instrument of service.
  34. Don’t be the richest person in the graveyard. Health is wealth.
  35. Life’s short. The greatest risk is risk-less living. And settling for average.
I genuinely wish you the best year of your life.

Stay Great.

Robin

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Comments

13 Responses, Leave a Reply
  1. 1 Anthony
    16 January 2012, 12:52 am

    You are amazing.

  2. 2 Nikki
    16 January 2012, 1:29 am

    Awesome! I’m borrowing this! Thank you for being so amazing.

  3. 3 Naomi
    16 January 2012, 11:06 am

    Such a good idea. Your mentor sounds pretty right-on, too. Need to get me one of those.

  4. 4 Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell
    16 January 2012, 7:52 pm

    Read it to yourself any time you get an inkling of self-doubt!

  5. 5 Beeb Ashcroft
    16 January 2012, 8:03 pm

    Sounds like an inspired way to start the New Year, thanks for sharing!

  6. 6 Kay Kay
    16 January 2012, 9:25 pm

    I might just copy and paste this and pretend I wrote it to myself.

  7. 7 Rachel @ Following In My Shoes
    17 January 2012, 6:29 am

    I am so doing this — I need to start believing positive stuff about myself instead of wallowing in the negative. Not sure I would have the guts to post it though … but I might.

    Good for you and you’re friend is right — it DOES make one love you too!

  8. 8 Karen
    17 January 2012, 9:00 am

    #3 jumped right out at me! I have never been good at math, and I failed 9th grade english 4 times so I never graduated high school. I finally got my GED when I was 39. It made me feel so good about myself that I applied for college. The first semester, I took English 101 and math–because I thought that if I couldn’t pass those two required classes there was no point in going further. I studied obsessively and made A+ in both! Once you conquer that which you fear, everything else is cake.

  9. 9 Jenny
    17 January 2012, 9:06 am

    Awesome idea!

  10. 10 Heather
    17 January 2012, 11:04 am

    I love this idea, I will have to try this. I could really use that lift right now :-\.

  11. 11 Lorie Shewbridge
    17 January 2012, 12:55 pm

    Candace,
    You made me cry… I love you, too!!
    You were so much fun to “hang around with” on Christmas eve.

  12. 12 Shop with Me Mama (Kim)
    17 January 2012, 8:11 pm

    LOVE this!!!

  13. 13 Tawanna
    20 January 2012, 1:40 pm

    That was so flipping awesome that I think I’m going to get off my computer now and think about it while I spend time with my kids.
    Your letter to yourself made my slightly uncomfortable because I started loving you too!! LOL! You’re awesome and I’m glad that you told yourself so. We have to keep re-affirming that for ourselves.

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